Wednesday, November 21, 2012

My Secret Admirer

February 17, 2008

At The London School, in honor of Valentine’s Day, we had a mailbox downstairs for valentines. Today, when the admin staff were going through the few valentines deposited within, they found one for me: a letter written in both English and Russian. I’m quite skeptical of this epistle, as it is unsigned and as it reads rather like a segment of Evgeny Onegin. I’m half convinced it’s a translation of a modified version of either Tatiana’s letter to Evgeny or vice versa, but as it’s been a good seven years since I last read Evgeny Onegin it might very well not be. I’m also slightly concerned that it might be from that creepy twik guy; while his English is nowhere near this good, he could very well have had help. Or an electronic translator. But as it is unsigned, it will remain a mystery. Anyway, the English version, complete with grammar and spelling errors for authenticity is as follows:

I write to the most charming girl on this world... Ah, what happiness that have this holiday. For the first time seems to me, I understand huge value of this holiday, because knowing that you beside I quail and can’t approach, and contrary to common sense, seeing you, at me language is braided and I lose gift of speech. Singing this letter I feel really worry and I feed hope, what perhaps you heart accept, my dreams devoid reason, perhaps in you the spark of hope for me (will small flame for me). But most likey to mine, unfortunately, having read, through will frown eyebrow and will throw my dreams in a garbage box, perhaps having read through indifference slightly only having raised spongos will smil. Only you such smil, from which since you here without mind. Annie, you are most charming, Annie you are most beautiful, Annie you are most attractive...

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